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THREE SMALL WORDS
written by Christopher Curtis
directed by Christopher Comeau
eps. 1-2 directed by Andrew Abelson
ep. 3 directed by Brian Groh

6 Episodes
Original Run: 2 Episodes - 3/19/11 - 3/26/11
Playoffs: 4 Episodes - 5/14/11 & 5/28/11 - 6/18/11

...that will change the world forever.

CAST

Erin Holt

Mona (Eps. 1-6)

Curt Bonnem

Steven (Eps. 1 & 3-6)

Cricket the Doll

Jon (Eps. 1-2 & 5-6)

Gregory Guy Gorden

Anthony (Eps. 2 & 6)

Jacob Sidney

Marcus (Ep. 2)

Stan Morrow

Marcus (Ep. 6)

Colin Willkie

Big B (Ep. 2)

Jillian Buschauer

Regina (Ep. 2)

Carrie Keranen

Honey (Eps. 3-6)

Matt Valle

King of the Gays (Ep. 5)

Darrin Glesser

King of the Gays (Ep. 6)

Chairman Barnes

The Jewish Producer (Eps. 5-6)

Terry Tocantins
Christopher Comeau
Ari Radousky

Film Crew (Ep. 5)

Rebecca Larsen

Regina (Ep. 6)

Colin Willkie
JJ Mayes

Guards (Ep. 6)

EPISODE ONE (3/19/11)
Photos by C.M. Gonzalez
Video by Adina Valerio

SUMMARY:  Mona, a neglected housewife, pours out her heart to the creatures of the forest. She's got a plan to make her husband, Steven, pay attention to her - she'll tell him she stole something. When this doesn't work, she scales up to killing a baby deer. No dice. He's upset that their son Jon's essay about his home life doesn't mention the expensive things he provides his family with. He's off to work, faking domestic happiness for his friends. She indulges in her fantasy of what Steven used to be like... but she can't enjoy it. She needs real Steven. Fantasy Steven recommends she dye her hair and lose some weight. Mona thinks that's good advice. She puts the animals to work cooking and cleaning while she takes Jon to school.

Mona (Erin Holt) confides in her woodland friends. Her husband, Steven (Curt Bonnem), is unresponsive... ...even when she tells him she killed a baby deer. She doesn't understand why he won't pay her any attention. Wifely servitude. Mona's sad. Mona dreams of what Steven used to be like. Fantasy Steven's upset that Mona has spurned him for Real Steven. Mona thanks Fantasy Steven for his advice while preparing to take Jon to school.


Mona charms the animals of the forest with her smile, song and stories.


Mona tells her animal friends how exciting her marriage used to be.

EPISODE TWO (3/26/11)
Photos by C.M. Gonzalez
Video by Chairman Barnes

SUMMARY:  Anthony wants to move from his small town to West Hollywood, where he and his gay partner can live freely, and he writes his conservative, Christian mother a letter to try to explain his heart.  His co-worker, the perpetually stoned Marcus, reveals his greatest secret: he can talk to birds.  This ability kept him out of Princeton, so he now aspires to be a rap artiste.  When Anthony expresses skepticism, Marcus calls for Big B - a gigantic, scary bird who doesn't seem to like Anthony very much.  Marcus sends Big B away.  Mona stops by the store, and during her visit, Jon's homework gets mixed up with Anthony's letter.  When Anthony and Marcus discover the mix-up, they realize they need to find Mona before she turns in Anthony's letter to Jon's teacher.

'I left my stash in the walk-in freezer.' Co-workers Anthony (Gregory Guy Gorden) and Marcus (Jacob Sidney). 'It no come out good!  There is a filter between my heart and the paper!' Anthony dreams of living in West Hollywood. 'I must live my life in freedom! My heart is trapped! My love is chained down!' Anthony's sweet love. Marcus prepares to make a confession. He tells the tale of how he learned he can talk to birds. His ability kept him out of Princeton, and his McJob keeps him from the woman he loves. Marcus summons Big B (Colin Willkie), who seems to have it in for Anthony. Mona stops by while taking Jon to school. Hot coffee is accidentally spilled. Curtain Call

PLAYOFFS WEEK ONE!
EPISODE THREE (5/14/11)

Photos by Aaron Francis * Video by Adina Valerio

SUMMARY:  Mona tries making a new dress to try to win Steven's love back.  She receives an unexpected visit from Honey.  They were best of friends in high school - like sisters (or at least cousins) - until the day Honey tried to seduce a drunken Steven at the Homecoming dance.  Anyway, Honey has come to tell Mona something important.  It's just three little words... but those words could ruin Mona's life and family and send Steven into Honey's arms.  Before she can say what they are, Steven comes home, and Honey begins flirting with him as Mona despairs.

Trying to make a new dress. "The drawings made it look so easy!" Mona consults her animal friends. An unexpected visit from old friend/enemy Honey (Carrie Keranan). Back in high school, Honey flirts with a drunken Steven behind Mona's back. "Don't you think Mona would be jealous if she saw us like this?"


Mona and Honey patch up their splintered friendship.

PLAYOFFS WEEK THREE!
EPISODE FOUR (5/28/11)

Photos by Aaron Francis * Video by Annette Fasone

SUMMARY:  Honey flirts shamelessly with Steven while belittling Mona for being poor, using the fact that she made her own dress against her.  Honey, who inherited a fortune from her late husband, Morty, reports that there's been an outcry over the essay their son handed in at Bible school - an outcry stoked by Honey, who has been talking to the media, describing their son as a "false prophet."  The second paragraph started with three little words: "Jesus is..."  Honey is interrupted by a commotion at the front door.  Steven answers... and finds himself pelted with Bibles by an angry mob.  "They're heeeeere," smirks Honey.

"Steven!" Honey prepares her charms. "What a good memory you have! All the better to remember me with!" Honey's boobs pop right out of her shirt. Accidentally, I'm sure. "You know I never wear underwear!" Mona's getting worried. On finding that Mona's made her own dress: "You're so talented! Oh, you're like a little Malaysian child!" Honey says she's got dire news. What are the three small words? "I can't even repeat it, for fear the Lord would set my tongue aflame." Honey told the newspeople that their son is a false prophet spreading his dogma to the children of this town.


Honey runs circles around Mona while vying for Steven's attention.

PLAYOFFS WEEK FOUR!
EPISODE FIVE (6/4/11)

Photos by Aaron Francis * Video by Annette Fasone

SUMMARY:  As Honey rants about sin, Steven goes outside and finds that the Christians have been driven off by a band of Jews and gays who believe that little Jon is the true messiah.  Enter a Jewish TV producer and the King of the Gays, part of a secret sect who have always believed that Jesus is gay.  They want the family to star in a reality show, and it doesn't matter that the family isn't actually Jewish, so long as they're entertaining.  Mona isn't sure this is right for her family, but the cameras have arrived...

Honey basks in the media attention. Steven goes outside to talk to the reporters. "I'm a Christian woman. I told Christian values. And when I see a horrible sin, it's your job to stamp it out. Even if it's your own son." "He's only five!" "A five year old drug mule of the devil, crapping out Lucifer's spleen!" Honey angrily throws back a book of Mormon. Steven's just happy to be famous. Meet the Jewish producer (Chairman Barnes) and the King of the Gays (Matt Valle). They believe Jon is the messiah, and want the family to star in their new reality show. "I am the Jewish producer! Producer of such films as 'Home Shalom' and 'All I Want For Christmas is Nothing, 'Cause I'm a Jew.'" They are part of a secret society of Jews and gays who have always believed that Jesus is gay. Honey continues to seduce Steven. "You son is going to make all of us a lot of money." Evidence is found in Da Vinci's "The Last Supper" - Jesus is pulling away from Mary Magdalene... she was his fag hag. Can't argue with that. No caption necessary. Steven ponders the offer while Mona worries. The TV crew arrive. Mona isn't sure this is right for her family. The cameras are rolling. Curtain Call


Mona's son wrote something shocking in his 5th grade class and now the
world bays for her blood, largely because of her troublemaking friend Honey.

PLAYOFFS WEEK FIVE!
EPISODE SIX (6/18/11)

Photos by Aaron Francis

SUMMARY:  As Christian talk show host Regina rails against the "Jewlyweds" reality show, Anthony and Marcus arrive and tell Mona about the switched papers.  (See episode two.)  However, the boys forget about telling the truth when they're offered roles on the show.  When Mona is removed from the show and replaced by Honey, Mona finally loses her temper and slaps her.  The ensuing fight is interrupted by the arrival of Regina... and her armed guards.  She declares that the boy is truly the prophet, but the Jews and gays are corrupting his message.  Steven will be King of the new world, but who will be Queen?  Mona is forced at gunpiont to engage in a Solomonic tug-of-war with Honey for her son.  The winner will be Queen.  The loser will be damned.  And either way, Jon will be torn apart.

On set. Mona worries. The King of the Gays (Darrin Glesser) is annoyed that Mona hasn't seen "Funny Girl." Steven's all about the cash. "Jesus will forgive us - it's in the Bible!" Marcus (Stan Morrow) and Anthony arrive. "Jesus" is Anthony's gay boyfriend. The "manifesto" is his, not Jon's. The boys forget about telling the truth when offered roles on the show. Steven orders Mona to stay in her place. Filming. Mona tries to play along. Mona is removed from the show and replaced by Honey. Christian radio host Regina (Rebecca Larsen) arrives with her armed guards. Regina believes the child is the prophet, but the message is being distorted by the gays and Jews. A Solomonic tug-of-war for the child. Curtain Call