that's Brad...


by Brad Friedman

August 7, 1999 - Well, it was another big week, This Week in Crime...But as bullets continue to fly from Atlanta to Alabama, it's the crime at our very own front door step that we must remain ever vigilante about.

Robert Downey, Jr.
Downey: 3 Years

The sentence: 3 long years…Chaplin, Weird Science, Chances Are, Mr. Willowby's Christmas Tree…yes, she's seen them all! She's Michelle Holden, wife of Pasadena City Councilman Christopher Holden.

Ms. Holden was recently sentenced to 3 years probation for having sex with her 15 year old baby-sitter...Well, not her baby sitter…the baby sitter she had apparently hired for her children. And now, and as if that isn't enough for the poor woman, now she's being sued in civil court for the same offense by the boy's family.

Michelle Holden
Holden: 3 Years

Now, maybe it's just me, but I used to baby sit quite a lot as a kid. And the best I ever got was 3 bucks an hour, all the Fantasy Island I could watch, and if I was lucky - a warm pan full of Jiffy Pop.

Her lawyer, of course, claims that she was the victim here. And, though he had apparently no basis for the comment whatsoever…I think he was probably right…

I mean, let's take a look at it…what did the woman really get out of it?… I mean sex with a 15 year old boy... Sure - it sounds good on paper…But what can a 15 year old boy do that say, an experienced 33 year old man cannot do better?

Now, 18, perhaps, I could understand. At the virile age of 18, perhaps, one might have the longevity thing going over us tired old…well, going over some of the men who fall within the 30+ age bracket. I mean, you've got quite a bit of strength at the age of 18 or even 21 for that matter. I mean, we can't stay young forever you know. And hell, some of us do have to wake up and get to work in the morning!… Not me of course, but some of us do!… Most 18 and 21 year olds, don't have to worry about that sort of thing…Plus, they probably don't have insurance payments and car payments and that sort of thing causes quite a bit of anxiety in a guy…But I digress…

The boy wasn't 18 or 21, he was only 15, and with a 15 year old, I'd think it'd be all over before you could say "Put the kids to bed as soon as Boy Meets World is over"…A quickie like that hardly seems worth getting suited up for.

Then on the other hand, do you have any idea what baby-sitters make these days? Sure, it's still less than dogwalkers, but it can be a tidy sum none the less. And as long as that boy was still on the clock, I can imagine that Ms. Holden may have wanted to keep things moving what with the meter running and all.

That romp in the hey, with a 15 year old boy at $8 an hour, that could run you a good….oh…95 cents to a dollar!

But you see, now it sounds like I'm bitter. And really I'm not. I mean if that 15 year old boy can be getting him some at that age with an older, hopefully attractive woman - than I say, more power to him…And as far as that goes, it doesn't really matter how attractive she was, does it?…At the age of 15, Marge Simpson can look pretty damned good in the middle of the night, in the dark, behind a locked door…It doesn't really take much….

So, you see, maybe we've rushed to judgement once again. Maybe she was the victim here after all.

She had to pay a lot of money, for sex that probably wasn't very good, and now she has to go to serve three long years of probation for it, and all the while, all she was doing as wife to a City Councilman, was doing her best to serve the constituency. And this is the thanks she gets…Where is the justice in that?

And that's this week's, This Week In Crime...

Previously in 
"CRIME SCENE 2000: The Race To the Whitehouse"

May 2, 2001   Timothy McVeigh must die, die, die! Quick! Hurry! Now! Die!
March 11, 2000 EXCLUSIVE VIDEO! CS2K Takes to the Polls on Super Tuesday!
March 4, 2000 EXCLUSIVE AUDIO! Pat Robertson vs John McCain in..."The Battle of the Voter Alerts!"
February 26, 2000 George W. in his own words!
February 19, 2000
(not yet available)
South Carolina Primary Results! And a visit from The President of the United States!!!
February 12, 2000 EXCLUSIVE Interview with the Reclusive John McCain!
December 4, 1999   The Battle for Seattle!
October 30, 1999  A Gorey Halloween Special! Caught on tape!
October 16, 1999 Y2K!!! Without the Hype!!! Read it now!!! NOW!!!
October 9, 1999 Spielberg Makes News! Must be a slow news week...
September 25, 1999  Felt Up by Diana Ross! Framed Up by the LAPD! And Fed Up by Media Minorities!
September 18, 1999  EXCLUSIVE! O.J. Simpson Bares All!
August 28, 1999   Reno Blows Denial! George W. Denies Blow!
August 14, 1999   Duchovny cries conspiracy & Buford goes ballistic!
August 7, 1999 Sex & The Baby-Sitter!
May 15, 1999 A special This Century In Crime, Millenial Minute!
May 8, 1999 Reagan goes to Jail, Moses goes to bat & Lolita goes home!
May 1, 1999 Littleton, Fabio and the Cola Wars play the race card!
April 24, 1999 Special Breaking News! Littleton Shootings.