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THIS WEEK IN CRIME

by Brad Friedman

** EXCLUSIVE REPORT! **
** MUST CREDIT
"THIS WEEK IN CRIME" **

September 18, 1999 -

Well, it was another big week, This Week in Crime…

And with so much breaking crime news bombarding us at the end of an exploding millennium, it's often difficult to deliver you the complete, in-depth coverage that you've come to expect from This Week In Crime on all of the week's crucial crime stories.

The pace of the web is fast and furious, and so we strive to bring you, always, the freshest most up-to-date-info on stories the second that they break! Whether we have the time to check out their validity or not!

wedgwood.jpg (9382 bytes)
Spared but by the grace of God!
A beautiful dinner plate
from the Jasper Collection:

We had been set to cover the stunning shootings this week at the Wedgwood Baptist Church in Fort Worth, Texas…Where a gunman shocked the nation by opening fire on a complete set of fine Wedgwood Tableware from the early 19th century… He destroyed eight priceless cup and saucer sets, and chipped or cracked the fine Wedgwood glazing from seven other serving platters, bread & butters sets and gravy boats.

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Simpson:
The jig is finally up!

But given the shocking turn of events, coming just before deadline, we've have had to change our focus at the last minute to bring you up-to-the-second information on the startling discoveries made by "This Week in Crime" within the last 12 hours! This is a World Exclusive!

The information that we've uncovered may finally bring the long long tragic O.J. Simpson saga to a close! After three long years of denial, O.J. Simpson this afternoon has

We interrupt this This Week In Crime to bring you a Special Severe Weather Advisory Edition of This Week In Weather

We will return to the previously scheduled web page in progress after this Special Severe Weather Advisory from the This Week in Weather Meteorological Action Center, equipped with the pulsating power of Doppler 9 Zillion Radar…

Well, it was another big week, This Week in Weather…and with the latest information now coming in on this month's Storm of the Century, we have the latest raw transcripts from the wind-ravaged landscape via our This Week in Weather Weather Watcher Scott Rabinowitz, who has reported to us LIVE via the web! These are unedited transcripts taken from the latest reports:
================

BRAD>> Scott, are you there?

SCOTT>> Yes.

BRAD>> Can you read what I'm writing?!

SCOTT>> Yes, I can read it just fine, Brad.

BRAD>> Good. Good to see that you're still in one piece, Scott...It's been an astounding week in weather this week as Hurricane Floyd has wreaked havoc on the helpless peoples of a dazed, dizzied and storm-battered nation...What are the conditions like where you are right now?

SCOTT>> They're fine.

BRAD>> The damage being caused by wind and rain must be terrifying at this hour in the wake of this monster Hell Storm from Hades!...

SCOTT>> Actually, it didn't turn out to be much of a storm at all...and it ended about three days ago...According to what I've seen on the news anwyay.

BRAD>> Are you able to stay safe where you are right now?

SCOTT>> Yes.

BRAD>> Where are you exactly?

SCOTT>> I'm at my desk, in my living room in Hollywood. Trying to get some work done. The De LeHoya fight is on in about an hour, so I don't want to miss it.

BRAD>> Hollywood, Florida? That was right smack dab in the midst of Floyd's path! Was it not?

SCOTT>> No, Hollywood, California. That's where I live. It's a beautiful day out, btw!

BRAD>> I'm sorry...the net connection seems to be breaking up, Scott…if you can bare with me...I'll try and hang onto the connection as long as I can!...How, uh...Scott, can read this?!

SCOTT>> Yes, I can read it fine. Like I could the last time you asked me...

BRAD>> Scott, how are you and the crew able to avoid the flying debris that can turn so quickly into deadly projectiles in the midst of the hurricane force winds accompanying this Mephistopholean Maelstrom?

SCOTT>> There is no flying debris, or hurricane force winds, Brad...And I don't have a crew... I'm just sitting here at my desk, acting like I'm a part of your fake Weather thingie.

BRAD>> Holy cow! I couldn't catch all of that, as the net connection is -- not suprisingly -- breaking up a bit, but it sounds absolutely terrifying, Scott!...Um, we'll remind participants at our Live Web Site who are following this LIVE chat that we are bringing you LIVE coverage of the latest developments in the unstoppable and unquenchable Storm of the Millenium that is currently ravaging a raped and prostrate nation...Um, sometimes it's difficult to keep our live reports going in these situations...

SCOTT>> Brad, I gotta go pee real quick before the fight comes on. Are we done?

BRAD>> ...Um...I'll tell you what, let's take a quick break right now and then we can return later with more breaking coverage via the net, with the latest reports of rain falling from the sky..and the foibles of our various reporters in the field being blown about in multi-colored rain slickers...as soon as events warrant...Um, we'll return you now to your regularly scheduled web page currently in progress.

### <END OF TRANSCRIPT> ###

This has been a Special Severe Weather Advisory from This Week In Weather… We now return you to your regularly scheduled web page currently in progress.

has simply stunned America…All we can say, is "Wow!"

And that's this week's, This Week In Crime...


Previously in 
"CRIME SCENE 2000: The Race To the Whitehouse"
 
and
"
THIS WEEK IN CRIME"


May 2, 2001   Timothy McVeigh must die, die, die! Quick! Hurry! Now! Die!
March 11, 2000 EXCLUSIVE VIDEO! CS2K Takes to the Polls on Super Tuesday!
March 4, 2000 EXCLUSIVE AUDIO! Pat Robertson vs John McCain in..."The Battle of the Voter Alerts!"
February 26, 2000 George W. in his own words!
February 19, 2000
(not yet available)
South Carolina Primary Results! And a visit from The President of the United States!!!
February 12, 2000 EXCLUSIVE Interview with the Reclusive John McCain!
December 18, 1999   FINAL TWIC OF THE MILLENIUM! AND THE MOST SHOCKING EVER!!!
December 4, 1999   The Battle for Seattle!
October 30, 1999  A Gorey Halloween Special! Caught on tape!
October 16, 1999 Y2K!!! Without the Hype!!! Read it now!!! NOW!!!
October 9, 1999 Spielberg Makes News! Must be a slow news week...
September 25, 1999  Felt Up by Diana Ross! Framed Up by the LAPD! And Fed Up by Media Minorities!
September 18, 1999  EXCLUSIVE! O.J. Simpson Bares All!
August 28, 1999   Reno Blows Denial! George W. Denies Blow!
August 14, 1999   Duchovny cries conspiracy & Buford goes ballistic!
August 7, 1999 Sex & The Baby-Sitter!
May 15, 1999 A special This Century In Crime, Millenial Minute!
May 8, 1999 Reagan goes to Jail, Moses goes to bat & Lolita goes home!
May 1, 1999 Littleton, Fabio and the Cola Wars play the race card!
April 24, 1999 Special Breaking News! Littleton Shootings.